Her Redeeming Love Page 13

  “But it’s time,” she whispered finally. Staring into her husband’s eyes, she pressed a kiss to her finger and traced it over his handsome face beside her own in the photograph. “It’s time…”

  * * *

  JOSIE WAS CRYING. Joe walked into the nursery and searched for her in the crib but she wasn’t there. Her cries rose in volume and he became frantic. Where was she? He turned, searched. Her cries grew louder and louder.

  Josie!

  He awoke with a start and shot up in bed, his chest heaving from the adrenaline racing through him. He looked around, unfamiliar with the room until his panic subsided.

  It was only a dream.

  Joe dropped back to the bed and wiped a hand over his sweaty face. A dream. Not the first and certainly not the last. Even now he still heard her cries.

  You’re losing it, Brody.

  But it wasn’t his imagination. The cries continued and Joe finally realized it was Max. Still shaking from the nightmare, he slung the sheet off his lower body and stood. He walked to the bathroom, dragged in several deep, eye-opening breaths and fought his frustration.

  Max continued to cry. Was he all right? Where was Ashley?

  Joe splashed cold water on his face. Still Max cried.

  He left his room and walked across the large, open foyer to the second floor hallway above the kitchen.

  The door to Max’s room was ajar.

  “I know. I’m sorry, honey. I’m just so tired I didn’t wake up. Mommy didn’t mean to sleep through your bellowing.”

  Joe smiled at the description. Bellowing was right on the money in Max’s case.

  Ashley got him settled on her lap in the rocking chair, the bottle in his mouth ending his fussy whimpers. The sight hurt because it was so beautiful, so caring and loving.

  “Better now? Don’t give me that look, I said I was sorry.” She smiled tiredly. “Ah, so you want a story now, too? So demanding,” she said, humor lacing her voice. “Where were we, huh?” She leaned her head back against the rocking chair’s wooden frame and sighed. “Okay…”

  Joe knew he should leave, walk away, but now that he was up and the temptation of learning more about Ashley had presented itself, he wanted to stay.

  Wilson’s words repeated themselves in his head.

  Was Ashley his second chance? His way of proving, somehow, that he hadn’t hurt Josie?

  Torn, he leaned a fist high against the wall outside the room. Head down, his thoughts were all over the place until he heard Ashley speak. Then he could do nothing but stay and listen.

  “Your daddy was a goof,” Ashley murmured. “But I loved him, Max. That man could make me smile when I was in the worst of moods. And I hated it,” she added with a wry laugh. “Because I couldn’t ever be mad at him for long. He wouldn’t let me. Instead he’d do something stupid to make me laugh and keep right on until he’d teased me out of my anger.

  “Since he was older, he left the home first and joined the Marines. I didn’t see him again. I dated a lot of losers in that time. Then I graduated and had to move out, got a couple jobs and my own place. And one day,” she said softly, “there he was. He looked so handsome in his uniform. He’d gone to the home and asked around, tracked me down. He sat at one of my tables and then stayed until my shift was over. We talked for hours just in little snatches between me running around waiting on people. From then on, every time he saved up enough money and had leave, he’d come to see me.”

  The chair creaked as she rocked, the rhythm soothing. Combined with the noises Max made while he sucked on his bottle, Joe felt…at home.

  “At first we were still just friends, trying to figure out life. Then one night I’d had a really bad day and I wished with all my heart he was there. And then he was. It was like magic. Max, I couldn’t believe it when I saw him. I actually thought I’d made him up. That weekend we realized we loved each other and we got married.

  “We wanted to give our babies everything we didn’t have, you know? We wanted you to live in a place where you don’t have to worry about anything. A home that’s warm and safe and one you can be proud of. We were going to have a family, one with a mommy and daddy, and brothers and sisters to fight with,” she said thickly. “That was our dream.” She sniffled, the chair creaking a time or two before she continued. “I want us to belong here, Max. In this big, beautiful house and this safe little town. And I’ll do whatever it takes to make it happen. Even if it means doing things I don’t like doing. For you, I will. I promise.”

  Ashley’s story picked up again, but Joe couldn’t stay any longer. It wasn’t right. And it wasn’t what he wanted to hear from her, either. She’d been happy until her husband died, had loved him. And she’d be happy and fall in love again when the right guy came along.

  But he wasn’t the guy. He wanted to be, ached to be, but he wasn’t. She had a dream and she couldn’t achieve it with him by her side. She wanted a good life for Max and that wouldn’t happen with him in her life messing things up. Even if she believed him at all.

  Joe retraced his steps back to his room and laid down on the bed. He stared at the ceiling for hours, searching for an answer, but one never found one. The sun broke over the horizon. Tired and aching from too much work and not a lot of rest, he got up and showered.

  Another day, another project. The sooner he finished, the sooner he could leave Ashley and her dream behind for another man to have.

  * * *

  SHOWERS SETTLED IN over the next few days and became a consistent soft rain. Joe began the ceiling work upstairs. He ripped out and repaired the Sheetrock that had been damaged from the leaky roof, and although she’d offered her help, his gruff refusals led Ashley to distance herself with other projects she could handle on her own.

  Neither of them mentioned the kiss. She supposed that was a good thing under the circumstances, but she couldn’t help wondering what he’d thought—or what he’d done about the arousal he’d walked away with. Had he gone to someone else? Found a pretty girl in town and taken care of things?

  Jealousy bit her hard.

  It also startled.

  No way. Could she actually be jealous? She’d known him a matter of weeks. Weeks, when it had taken her years of knowing Mac before she’d ever felt a smidgen more than friendship.

  But she couldn’t lie to herself. Or avoid the truth of Joe’s past. Would he stay out of jail?

  You don’t know him or know he’s really turned his life around.

  Joe staying here was temporary and she had to remember it, kiss or no kiss.

  “Ashley?”

  She whirled around and found the object of her thoughts standing in the doorway of the library, his expression confused.

  “What, did you need something?”

  He shook his head, but still frowned. “You changed your mind?”

  About him? Definitely…not. “About what?”

  Joe stepped deeper into the room and indicated the trim brush in her hand. “I thought you were going to leave the bookshelves as they are.”

  Her eyes widened and she whirled back around only to find she’d done the unthinkable. Lost in thought, she’d finished trimming up the wall and moved on to paint over the side of the hand-carved, stained mahogany bookshelves.

  “No! Oh, no!” She dropped the brush into the paint pan and grabbed the towel she kept tucked into the waistband of her shorts for drips. Instead of wiping the paint away, all she did was smear it around.

  Ashley turned to Joe for help but found him gone. She’d nearly burst into tears at her mindless blunder when he returned with a plastic container of water and a sponge.

  “Watch out.”

  She scrambled out of the way and Joe quickly went to work. His long, lean hands squeezed the sponge and scrubbed the wood, over and over again until the barest hint of color remained.

  “Do you have a fresh towel?”

  She handed him one from a nearby stack and he wiped the lower side of the bookcase down. No more paint rem
ained that she could see.

  “There. You must have really been lost in thought.”

  Ashley smoothed her trembling hands over her head, wet her lips. “Yeah. Yeah, I guess I was.”

  Joe’s gaze narrowed. He stood, the action placing him so close that she could feel the heat radiating off his body.

  “Did you go into town yesterday?” she blurted suddenly, the jealous witch on her shoulder determined to have her way. “To—to see your dad?”

  The movement was so slight she might have imagined it, but Ashley thought she saw his lashes lower a bit, the move not as casual as it looked, but…protective?

  “Yeah. Why?”

  “Did you not mean to kiss me?”

  “You kissed me back.”

  She’d hoped he’d forgotten that part.

  Joe closed his eyes briefly before opening them and giving her a look she couldn’t comprehend.

  “Look, Ashley, I understand why you don’t want me kissing you—”

  “Why’s that?”

  He faltered. “You’re my boss.”

  “Yeah. Yeah, I am.” Did he move closer?

  “And I’m an ex-con.”

  The air left her lungs. “It bothers me,” she admitted softly. “But only because I knew guys at the home who’d get in trouble once and then they’d do it again and again, and even though they had a chance at a better life, they’d go back and screw up every time.”

  “That part of my life is over. I promise you that.”

  He said it with such conviction and strength, she couldn’t help but believe him. It was exactly what she wanted him to say, too. But did believing him make her a fool when she had Max to think of, to protect?

  “You think I’m lying.”

  “No,” she said quickly. One look into his eyes told her he wasn’t. “I believe you, it’s just—”

  “You want to be sure because of Max.”

  Her shoulders sagged. “I have to be sure because of Max,” she said, inexcusably relieved that he understood.

  Maybe she compared him to the juvenile delinquents she’d known growing up, but Joe wasn’t like them. Not even on the most elemental levels. He’d been honest with her, and had come clean about his prison stay, worked harder than any man she’d ever known, not to achieve his dream, but to help her achieve hers.

  You pay him to work for you.

  But he was different, and she did him an injustice by not giving him the chance at a new life, like the one she wanted for herself.

  And the attraction between them?

  It was just that. Attraction, nothing else, the physical needs of their bodies calling out to one another.

  Joe stepped close, so close his chest brushed hers and electricity zapped through her body.

  Nothing else, huh?

  He watched her, waited, gave her as much time as she needed to sort through the chaos in her mind. The next move was up to her, that much was obvious.

  The scent of soap and man filled her head and added to her confusion. White powder from the gypsum board streaked across his chest, and she found her fingers following the path. Felt the warm, thick muscle beneath the material of his shirt. The beat of his heart. Joe was a flesh-and-blood man. Not perfect, but he didn’t pretend to be, either. He was just…Joe.

  The phone rang and she startled, then laughed. “Sorry. I’d—I’d better get that.”

  Joe placed a hand over hers and held it to him, his expression grim. “Ashley…there’s something else you need to know.”

  The baby monitor crackled loudly as Wilson answered the phone, then, “Missy! It’s Doc Booker. I think he wants another date!”

  Joe stiffened, his expression closed. He stepped back. “I’d better get back to work.”

  “But—What were you going to say? What else do I need to know?”

  He hesitated. “Nothing…enjoy your date with the doc.” Joe scowled, walking away. “Folks consider him a good catch.”

  Chapter 11

  JOE TOOK A LATE LUNCH to avoid Ashley. She’d left him a note on the table telling him to help himself to the pot roast she had warming in a Crock-pot. He ate, then ten minutes later, borrowed the keys to Wilson’s beat-up old truck and headed for Ridgewood.

  Inside the air-conditioned home he found Mrs. H. waiting. “Hello, Mr. Brody.”

  Joe laughed wryly. “You can call me Joe, Mrs. H.”

  She tsked at him and stood. “Perhaps I will when we’re back on good terms.”

  He fell into step beside her. “So what’ll it take?”

  Mrs. H. paused, lifting her chin high as she regarded him. “For you to read to our guests,” she suggested smoothly. “Someone frightened off our last reader.”

  Meaning him…and Melissa?

  Joe looked over Mrs. H.’s head to find about twenty people scattered throughout the cafeteria. Some talking, some playing board games. Some just staring off into space.

  * * *

  “That’s probably not a good—”

  “Your father said earlier he’d join us today. He doesn’t do that very often, but think of how proud he’d be to see you making an effort to make amends.”

  “Low blow, Mrs. H.”

  “Whatever it takes, Mr. Brody.”

  He stared her down, knowing without a doubt she had him. He rubbed the back of his neck, felt the grit of gypsum and frowned. “I didn’t clean up because I have to go back to work. I didn’t expect—”

  She smiled. “You look fine. They’ll be listening to your voice, Mr. Brody. And if memory serves, you have a fine voice for pubic speaking.”

  * * *

  ASHLEY HAD FINISHED painting the library and carried Max upstairs when she heard Joe drive up to the house. She peeked out her bedroom window to watch his lazy stride, but when he left her vision she dropped the lacy sheer back into place and returned to surveying the clothes on her bed with a frown.

  She’d agreed to a date—a full-fledged, kiss-him-good-night date—with Bryan Booker.

  And even though she’d asked herself a million times why she’d agreed, she knew. She was ready. Removing her wedding band was only a part of what she’d been feeling for a while, a symbol. And now? She was ready to move on and ready to feel alive again. Ready to gain some perspective on Joe.

  She hoped going out with Bryan—someone so completely opposite Joe in every way—would allow her to do it.

  Maybe this would help her decide if her interest in Joe involved his rough good looks and close proximity, or…something more. Either way, she had to find out, and a date with Dr. Booker— Bryan—would give her that much needed reality check.

  Bryan was nice, handsome, well-educated and as far as she knew, had never broken the law or been imprisoned. She owed it to Max and herself to think with her head. That’s why she’d agreed.

  But unlike most women who had a closet full of dresses, she only owned one. Short and black—just the way Mac had liked them. A dress she’d bought to wear for their second wedding anniversary, but then never got the chance because his leave had been canceled.

  Ashley pulled the dress from the closet and carefully unwound the knot of plastic at the hem. Soft, filmy, the dress was elegant and provocative at the same time. Wearing it for her husband was one thing, but would the dress give Bryan the wrong idea?

  “What do you think, Max?” She held the dress up in front of her for Max’s drooling perusal. “I thought so. But it’s the only dress I have so…it’s got to be the one.”

  Max made a happy, gurgling sound and let go of the blankets he held on to at the side of her bed. Unable to balance, he fell on his diaper-padded rump and looked to her as though trying to decide whether or not to cry.

  Ashley tossed the dress aside and clapped her hands. “Yay, good one! Yay!”

  Tears forgotten, Max grinned at her and brought his hands up to clap.

  “Good job, Max.” She bent and picked him up. “Come on, little man. Let’s go see what you’ve got to wear.”

  An h
our later Max was dressed and playing in his upstairs crib. A bath had relaxed him and maybe with some luck he’d take a nap before Bryan arrived.

  She pulled her hair away from her face and secured it in a twist at the back of her head, then pulled a few straight tendrils along the side of her cheeks in the hopes they would soften all the harsh angles that made up her face. Forgoing hose, she slipped into her only pair of strappy heels and frowned at her image. Dressing up for a date with Bryan felt strange yet it was funny how kissing Joe seemed right in comparison.

  She looked down at her ringless finger and bit her lip. She went to the dresser in Max’s room and opened the wooden box that held her wedding band.

  Oh, Mac, am I doing the right thing?

  A warm, contented feeling filled her. And without a doubt, Ashley knew it was Mac’s way of telling her everything would be all right. That he wanted her to be happy.

  Ashley closed the box and headed toward the bathroom.

  A glance at the clock said it was too late to cancel. She had to go. Bryan had mentioned he was staying at his elderly grandfather’s home between Taylorsville and Baxter until an apartment above his practice could be completed, which meant to get here by the appointed time, he had to have already left.

  Nervous, a little sick, she grabbed her brush.

  The last thing she needed to be worrying about was Joe’s reaction. They’d shared a couple of really hot kisses and enough heat between them to set the house on fire. But before she could even remotely consider Joe potential father material, she had to test the waters. Use her head and Max’s best interests to make up her mind.

  Whatever her feelings were for her hunky, ex-con handyman…she’d find out tonight.

  * * *

  TWO AND A HALF hours later, Ashley sat back against the padded booth with a moan. “No, no more. I can’t eat another bite. I don’t know how Wilson does this.”